Wednesday, May 4, 2016

From now to forever

Surprisingly I'm here
Still
Emotionally compromised
Physically exhausted
Mentally unstable
Spiritually deficient
I want to blame you for this
I need to
None of this makes sense
Yet I knew it would happen
I knew this would be the outcome
You remind me of the others
I've done this before
Been here
Felt this
But this time is different
It will be the last time
I can't do this
I won't do this
Today I will start anew
Again
For the last time
I need to be whole
To be peaceful
To have love
And be loving
Today is a new day
The rain is falling softly
Cleaning my sins
Washing my mind of all evidence
Rinsing my body of hurts
Past
Present
Today I feel like I need to put all the love I desperately try to give to you to myself
Today I will move forward
Today I will forgive you and me for this mess
Today is the perfect day to start anew

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