Allow me to reintroduce myself

My Name is Hov H to the O V I use to move snowflakes by the O Z Even back then you can call me C E O of The R O C My Bad....You Know I love Jay Z!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

. OK my life has had some MAJOR but much needed changes over the Past Year and most definitely the last month.... I have been a little MIA... Not calling, texting, or emailing as I would normally do...With that said I am back.. But then again.. For some of ya'll I was not.. I have had alot of personal issues..

The issues have been work related, personal, family, relationship etc... You name the area I had issues...I mean ISSUES from it.. lol... Wow... So much has changed with me.. But I am back...I have been in some of your lives for years yet there are lots of areas of me that you don't know. For some the new relationship and move was no surprise for others you feel like what happened to my favorite Gay Couple???

The Best way to Start this story is at the beginning of end of life as I knew it.. Or as I like to call My Going Forward... I was lonely, uneducated, frustrated, heart broken, in a relationship that to some of you looked really cute on the surface but for the few of you that I confided in ya'll knew it was a ZOO, using AA batteries like they were going out of style (is that TMI???)...Not going to Church, Not praying, Feeling TRAPPED by my life... Has anyone felt that way?????

Anyway I went to the Flow ( a workshop) www.visionascend.com to renew and develop me.. IT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!! From September 5 -7.. There I worked on ME.. Childhood Crap, Adult Crap, just EVERYTHING.. Meet alot of WONDERFUL people.. One of whom you will definitely meet and love.. My BFF LT

I came home renewed, happy. ready to continue my work on me, new, and improved but I came back home to someone who had also went to the Flow two weeks before me but was not ready to live life happily, abundantly, and authentically. Needless to say _______ and I are no longer together. I wish her well on her journey.

My journey is far from over...I am still looking my dream job, looking for a job that pays the bills, enrolling into school before the month of November is over (yes as a Full time Student), being a better friend, sister, daughter, mother, person, and striving for 110% from myself everyday.. But I am in love with ME again!!! I am getting ME in some type of Gospel order...LOL.. I feel like life is sweeter, better,and brighter now. I have laid my burdens down. I am no longer in a state situational depression.... I have a new outlook on life, on love, and on Me.. Can I get an Amen up in this Camp??????

LIFE

My life
is
wonderful

there are, have been, and will be some bumps in the road but I will be ok

Here it is

Sometimes well alot of times your heart wont do what your head tells it to. Love is such a funny thing. Ironic funny not comedic funny.. Now before ya'll give me the side eye. My Boo and I are good. I'm just analyzing some shit. I felt deeply and strongly and wholely about someone that I knew I shouldn't. A few of my friends are/have gone though something similar. Thee point of this is if your head says stop and your heart is hurting..Listen

It's been a long time - I shouldn't have left you

I Baaaaacccccccckkkkkk! LOL... Been going through a few things on my end.. But here I am Big and Bold as Shit.. stay tuned i have alot to say

Who love's you????

Do they wanna do right by you?

Do they care about what keeps you up at night?

Can they embrace your freaky side?

Do they know how you like it rough sometimes?

Do they reach for you at night?

Can they be this sexy at this size?

Do they pray for your peace and happiness?

Can they keep you warm at night?

Do they know where you spot is?

Can they Be a role model to you?

will they make they own do or sit around the house?

Can they let you shine?

Will they come to your office and hit you off?

Can they hold you down when shit gets thick?

Can they be a mother?

Are they your whores?

Will they do whatever, whenever, and however like me?

Will they be submissive when you are cocky?

Are the aggressive when you are weak?

Can they kick ass like me?

Will they cook dinner every night with something sexy on?

Will they unbuckle their seatbealts and .... well you know?

Will they fold under pressure?

Will they say yes to a threesome, foursome, or whatever you have in mind for the night?

Will they roll over after you come in from a long night of partying?

will they do a striptease for you?

Will they keep the house running smooth so you can handle the real world?

Can they pay for trips and sprees like me?

Questions

I wrote this years ago, ran across it recently.. Still love it!

is it love when I reach out to you and end up fallin?

Do you even know whatyou do to me?

is it love when you cum and I don't?

Do you want me?

You see I can't end this, Why don't you?

Do you like me?

Why don't you love me?

What do you call it when I am honest and you lie?

How do you send me to voice mail?

What do I mean to you?

Where is your compassion?

What does "friend" mean to you?

Do you love me?

Why do you act this way?

How do you live, love,and laugh without me?

Do you care about me?

Do you think about me?

Why do you string me along?

If you want me outta your life why don't you just tell me?

Do you ever feel bad for treating me like this?

Why is it that everytime I asked you "do you want me?" you say "yes" but your actions say no?

Do I love me?

Letting go of the Past

ain't always easy